Moving On to the Holidays!

Hello everyone!  I seem to be back on track with my food this week - and SO on with the exercizing.  I even ordered a new set of DVDs that I can't WAIT to receive - Turbo Fire.  I'm a big fan of Turbo Jam, so this is the step up that I've been waiting for.

But enough complaining about my life for a while!

Today I want to post about a GREAT deal from Shutterfly!  I know that Halloween is just this weekend (and I can't wait to dress up!) but after that, it's really full speed ahead into the winter holidays!!

Shutterfly has some awesome new cards in their lineup this year - and now all you bloggers can get in on a super deal!  But first, let me talk about my favorite card:

I like the idea of sending out "holiday" cards, rather than Christmas cards.  My husband and I are not religious, although we do celebrate Christmas - I mean, how could we NOT with a 5-year-old at home?!  We send cards to friends all over the country and even overseas, so we like to send a general wish to everyone as to not offend those with differing views.

I also like that this card only has one photo on it - since it's just my husband, daughter and I, it's not like I want to have separate photos of each of us (like I might do if we had more children) - so it's nice to add just one family photo to the card.  And I LOVE the colors on this one too!

Make sure you check out the new cards at Shutterfly - these are some of my favorite links:

http://www.shutterfly.com

http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery

http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/christmas-cards

Shutterfly is offering 20% off all holiday cards - check them out at http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery

Thanks for listening!  Have a very safe Halloween!!

Jen 

WTF is wrong with me?

Sorry - I know it's been a while since I posted last.  Not that many people are even reading this, but I started this to help myself, and even I haven't been here.  Ugh.

Last time I posted, I had made some big announcement that I had decided to do WW on my own - that I was committed to losing weight again.  I was right on with points for 5 days, and I worked out 4 of the 5.  Then the weekend came, and once again, I pigged out.  I had planned to eat my Flex points on Saturday - our group of friends had our annual lobster bake.  I did overeat, but we only have this event once a year and it's the only time I get certain foods.

Then came Sunday.  It was just a nice day to hang out with my daughter and my parents (hubby was out for the day.)  So what did I do?  Got pizza for lunch, and then snacked all day on NOTHING at my parents' house.  I mean, did I REALLY want or need cheese popcorn, or plain crackers, or 4 pieces of Halloween candy?  I didn't have one vegetable the whole day (unless you count the 2 Tbsp of sauerkraut that was stuck to the huge piece of fatty pork that I ate.) 

So what the F is wrong with me???

I've been getting up at 5:30 A.M. to work out before work.  I've been bringing strange, but low-point, items to work for lunch (like really, do I WANT to eat a can of beets for lunch?  NO.)  I've been making healthy dinners.  I've been listening to my daughter whine when we don't have any sweets in the house.

What the F is so good about plain crackers and cheese popcorn that I would eat that junk, when I'm totally sabotaging all the good work I do all week?

NOTHING!  I have to get in my head and see what is keeping me from succeeding.  We're not all fortunate enough to have Jillian Michaels come to our house and yell that we're good enough to do this.  Why do I believe her when she says that I can do 100 jumping jacks - but can't believe in myself?

I HAVE to focus this week.  I have to get rid of these demons in my head.

I AM WORTH IT.

Decisions

TGIF!

So I found out yesterday that the Weight Watcher meetings that I've been anxiously waiting to begin are now not happening.  It was to be an At-Work meeting, and they didn't have enough people interested to join.  I did a lot of thinking, and talking to a friend.  I don't want to attend another meeting, because it's just not convenient.  I know that's a lame excuse, huh?  But that doesn't mean that I don't want to continue with this journey.

WW assures us that they will start the work meetings in January, you know, when all of the holiday bingers are ready to make their New Year's Resolutions and take off the 20 pounds they just put on.  So until then, my friend and I are going to have our OWN meetings.  I made up little weigh-in booklets for us, and we're going to be accountable to each other each week.  We already meet for lunch during the week, and we're always talking about little tips that we find, so this will just be an extention of our regular lunch.  We're even going to give each other stickers for good things that we do!

It might sound corny, but I NEED someone or thing to be accountable to - not just myself.  You would think that I would be my own toughest judge, but I'm really my own manipulator.  I can argue myself out of anything.  I think a lot of people have that problem, and that's why WW is so successful.

On Tuesday, I will meet my friend and HONESTLY tell her my fate, and she will do the same.  But I think I see some stickers coming my way!

Have a good weekend!

Jen

Getting it all out there

I was just reading one of my fave blogs, All The Weigh, and Kenzie posted an awesome questionairre that she found from another blogger, so why not pass it on??  This falls just at the right time, because I've been wanting to get all of this info out on my blog, both for myself and for anyone else out there who might be reading.  Thanks, Kenz!

1. What was your highest weight, what do you weigh right now and what is your goal weight?

The highest weight that I can remember was in September of 1999 - 275 pounds!  Yikes.  I currently weigh 187 (which is still unbelievable to me!).  I'm always conflicted with my goal weight.  I always say 175, because that's what I was in high school and it sounds like a confortable number, but I would still be overweight.  So it really should be about 160.  That just seems unobtainable to me, but it's all in my mind!

2. What is your #1 motivation for losing weight?

I want to be considered normal... (Same as Kenz).  I feel that I've never been normal.  My #1.5 motivation is my daughter.  She is 5 1/2 years old and already overweight.  I'm trying so hard to teach her to be healthy, but I have to SHOW her how it's done.

3. Have you always been overweight?

Pretty much.  I was always the tallest girl, and developed the earliest in school, so it's hard to say when I was first overweight.  But I remember being 9 years old and going to Sears to the misses department to by shirts and pants from the Cheryl Tieggs collection.  Horror!

4. When you want to give up what inspires you to keep going?

I think about how far I've come, and what is still left to be accomplished.  And I think about my daughter and how I have to do this for her future as well as mine.

5. What is the #1 thing you look forward to when you hit your goal weight?

Shopping until I drop.  And I have a reward in mind - that my hubby and I take a trip to New York.  I've been around the world, but never to New York!

6. Do you have support on your weight loss journey?

Yes - mostly my hubby and daughter, and I have a friend who is on the same journey, so we share a LOT!

7. What is your favorite exercise?

Probably Turbo Jam.  I don't like machines - they're too boring.  I would rather be dancing and kicking around.  I really want to try a Zumba DVD soon.

8. What is the most important thing you have learned on your weight loss journey?

That first and foremost, I have to be on this journey for myself.  Once I'm happy, other things will fall into place.

9. What is one thing you have given up that you miss the most?

I haven't really haven't given up anything.  Sometimes I think I should - I do have some trigger foods that I try to limit, but I've learned that I can't punish meself by not enjoying treats from time to time.

10. What is your strategy for losing weight?

Just keep on keepin' on.  It's a journey that will NEVER end, so you just have to live with it.  Basically, it's calories in and calories out, but it's hard to think that way without it taking over your life.  You just have to take it day by day.


These questions have made me think about just far I've come, and that I don't have a huge distance left to go.  I have to stop being so lazy and just doing what I feel that I want to do.  I don't really want to eat a whole pizza.  I want to be healthy and normal.

Jen

Back to happiness :)

I'm back, baby!

Eating well.  Working out.  Being a PERSON, not a lump.  I'm loving it.

My hubby is back too.  He's been going through some rough times - working full time, going to school, being a dad and hubby - it's a lot, and I do what I can to help him out. 

It's a rainy, yucky day, but I'm feeling good.

I hope to start posting about REAL stuff next week.  Still getting the hang of blogging, and getting back to my old self.

For now I'll leave you with this - an OLD picture of me - thinking was happy, but just being miserable, even in Vegas!  I was probably 24 years old, and about 275 pounds.  Yikes.

Happy Hump Day!

Jen

Seriously???

Two days?

About 45 days of feeling unhappy.  Fixed in two days?

It's my second day back to eating healthy and working out (although I had been working out from time to time over the past few weeks.)  I'm already feeling so much better - physically and emotionally. 

So why on earth wasn't I just doing this the whole time?

Are pizza and cupcakes and Chinese food and full-fat pumpkin spice lattes really worth all that????

No.  And that's why I have to just stick to my plan.  I will have success.  Even if the scale or the size of my pants doesn't go down, I will have success because I will be happier.  A Size Ten doesn't make happiness.  Strength and belief in yourself does that!

Friend Makin Monday

If you want to join the FMM fun the copy and paste this week's question onto your blog, and don't forget to add a link below! It's a great way to get to know fellow bloggers while sharing a little about yourself too! And take a little time to comment on a few others as well. We all like to receive comments, don't we? ;)

What I love about Fall!

Oh, Fall is my absolute favorite time of the year!  The cool, crisp weather.  Orange, red and yellow leaves.  Pumpkin-flavored anything (coffee, pie, candles...)  College football.  The Steelers.  Halloween.  My friends' famous Halloween party, and trying to come up with the funniest costumes.  Back to school.  The Charlie Brown Halloween and Thanksgiving specials.  Getting ready for Christmas.  Candy corn.  The crunch of dried leaves under my feet.  Cuddling up with a blanket to watch TV at night.  Our annual Lobster Bake.

Now I'd like to know what you love about Fall. Don't forget to share a link to your post! :) Happy Monday Friends!

1. Physicallee Fit 2. Sara 3. Jenn 4. Alpine Poppy

5. jen 6. Trooppetrie 7. Brown Eyed Girl Jenn 8. Southern Domestic Goddess

9. Smiling is Good for your Teeth 10. Brandi. 11. You're next!

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And so it begins.

Day One.  Numero Uno.  #1.  It's here.  Thank goodness.

Had my Last Meal - well, Meals - over the weekend.  Why do I need to that?  Well, no worrying about it now, because it's done and behind me.  Had all of my favorites - pizza, wings, pumpkin spice coffee, breadsticks, a huge cupcake.  Not that I can't have these things on my journey, just in moderation.

I stepped on the scale this morning and was VERY lucky to have only gained about 6 pounds since July - I don't know how that is, but I'll take it.  I'm ready for a new, and hopefully the last, start.

It's just in time too.  Seems that my unhappiness with myself was really taking a toll on others around me, mostly by hubby.  I've been snapping at him a lot the past few weeks and he finally let me know that it was making him unhappy too.  Wow, did I feel really bad.  I made a promise that I'm done.  Sick of it.  Moving on in my life and our lives.

Today I'm having lunch with my WW friend - we can't start the actual meeting yet, but we're getting started today.  We both weighed in over the weekend and we both need this new start.

Let the journey begin!

The march to life

When I was first thinking about my post for today (in the bathroom, putting on make-up - where I do my best thinking) I was going to title it "the march of death."  As I've been writing about this week, I am "starting back" to Weight Watchers on Monday with a friend.  My 3 months of debauchary are coming to an end.  I've been on a week-long binge, eating all of my favorites that I won't be eating when I'm on death-row.  I even stopped this morning for my last pumpkin spice latte, one of my favorite things about the fall.

But when I really thought about it, it's really the opposite.  This is my March to LIFE!  (Another) beginning to being normal.  I'm so close.  I have to get out of this mentality that it's a bad thing, because that couldn't be farther from the truth.  I need that switch in my brain to move over to healthy mode. 

I think my main issue is that I keep thinking back to where I once was.  When I started this 3 years ago, I was about 250 pounds.  Right now, I"m about 60 pounds less than that!  That 250 pound woman is not me, and it never will be me again.  The other night I was cleaning out a closet and I came across my old weigh-in cards from when I was doing WW.  I usually hold on to that kinds of stuff as a record as to what I've done.  But I decided that they were literally weighing me down.  I will never go back to that.  Yes, I've accomplished A LOT, but I need to start over from now.

In a way, it's like I'm punishing myself for where I've been when I should be very proud of what I've done.  And I'm going to do it again.

Marching on.....

Jen